A year from now you will wish you had started today. -Karen Lamb
As human beings, we’re creatures of habit. No wonder making a major life change is so hard! But it can be done. In this 2 part post are 10 steps that can get your change in motion, one easy step at a time:
6. Develop a compelling vision
Leaving a longstanding relationship or a long time career can be very frightening. This is because if what we have is all we see, then to give it up means we’ll have nothing left. This is a terrible illusion. New opportunities, relationships, resources, connections, and ideas always rush in to fill space in our lives. But first, you have to make the space for something new, and second, create a clear vision of what your life will look like once your change is complete. The vision of your new future eliminates the fear of the unknown which can keep you stuck for a long time! Your vision will form the matrix on which you will create your new life and give you the inspiration and courage you need to move on.
7. Risk failure
Does your fear of failing keep you stuck? If so, define what failure looks like to you. Imagine the worst possible thing happening. Can you live with that? Can you make course corrections before it happens or after it happens? The answer is almost always “yes.” So, please, do yourself a favor, remove the word “failure” from your vocabulary. Realize that each action simply yields a result one you want or one you don’t want. Use this as feedback from the universe and take the next logical step. From this perspective, mistakes are just indications of a course correction and not to be taken personally. Pilots are checking their compass all the time and making course corrections based on this feedback. They’d never get anywhere if they took every off-course reading as a personal failure. Give up the concept of failure and take flight!
8. Recruit your inner warrior
Within each of us there is an instinctual aspect built for bold, decisive action. It looks out, not only for our survival, but also for our soul’s mission. It sends messages in the form of feelings in your body. They may come as “gut” feelings, or just a sense of “knowing” that has no rational foundation. If you’re facing a difficult change, and have “contemplated” yourself into a corner, it may be time to let your inner warrior take over for a while. Just act as if you “know” what to do, then do it without thinking about it until after it’s done.
9. Get support to help you through the change
Big life changes can be overwhelming. There’s no shame in asking for help from friends, relatives, or from a coach. In fact, enough of the right kind of support can make a seemingly difficult change, relatively easy. For me, being a former lone-ranger, asking for and accepting help from others was difficult at first, but really nice once I got used to it. Now I wouldn’t think of starting a major project or making a big change without relying on my support system of close and loving friends, and my coach. Do whatever is necessary to make change easy on yourself. You’re worth it!
10. Don’t go to your deathbed wondering what would have happened if…
It’s easy for us to forget how short our lives really are. Many of us live as if we’ll never die. We waste away our hours and days working jobs we hate, living just for the weekends, or “putting in time” until retirement, living most of our lives like zombies. We may live in a relationship that is draining and dis-empowering thinking it might magically get better somehow, someday. We deny our feelings or make excuses for frittering our lives away. This is insane. Stop it now! Our lives are so precious and so short. I challenge you to project yourself forward to your death. It’s real and it’s coming for you! See yourself on your deathbed and ask yourself if the life you’re living now is all you dreamed it would be. Write your own obituary today. How close are you to living your passion? Let this vision be a motivator to get off your butt and follow your dreams!